The Adventures of Surfer-Dude
Posted on March 25, 2014 by Robert Ringer — Comments (28)
So many wannabes manage to grab their fifteen minutes of fame, only to quickly (and mercifully) disappear from the public eye. But not so with San Diego Surfer-Dude (real name Jason Greenslate) who, thanks to the desperate-for-content news media, seems determined to stay in the public eye for as long as the welfare state is willing to support his lifestyle.
To his delight, a number of reporters and news anchors have covered the adventures of Surfer-Dude over the past year or so in an apparent effort to stir up thoughts of euthanasia amongst those who still believe in the quaint notion of working for a living. The media seems to be enamored by a beach bum who brags about buying lobster and sushi with his food stamp allotment. I guess they believe it proves that redistribution-of-wealth policies do, in fact, work quite well for those on the receiving end of things.
In a recent episode of Surfer-Dude, The O’Reilly Factor sent all-American boy Jesse Watters to visit with the twenty-nine-year-old unemployed surfer and chat with him about his life and his prospects for the future.
It was quite a contrast in styles — the well-groomed Watters, sporting a clean-cut, short-hair look, and Surfer-Dude, featuring scraggly locks flowing down past his shoulders, cigarette dangling from the side of his mouth, tank-top shirt, black ball cap worn in the classic in-your-face backward position, sunglasses, and a vocabulary you would expect of any surfer-dude worthy of his scruffy image.
Everything Watters asked Surfer-Dude brought forth a river of banal words and phrases such as “chicks,” “booze,” “cool,” “hey, man,” etc. A paragon of intellectualism he is not. But Surfer-Dude insists he’s a serious musical artiste and full-fledged member of a cool little band with the heartwarming moniker “Rattlife.”
When Watters asked him how much money he expected to make in his music career, Surfer-Dude responded, “Millions and millions of dollars, man.” In fact, he thinks it will happen so quickly that he’ll be off food stamps within a month. His positive mental attitude is enough to send a tingle up Chris Matthews’s leg.
But don’t laugh. When you consider all the publicity the media has given him and pair that up with the cesspool culture that dominates a large part of American society, it’s not out of the question that Surfer-Dude could join the ranks of so many other crude, untalented, young miscreants who have become rich and famous simply by being outrageous.
I realize that a lot of intelligent, hardworking Americans who bathe regularly get upset when they see vile stuff like this, but do guys like Surfer-Dude really signal the death of Western values? Short of America’s apathetically allowing itself to slide all the way to communism, I think not. I believe that quality — in products, music, art, and people — will never be relegated to the trash bin of anachronisms and that hard work, knowledge, and sound morals will always find a way to rise to the top.
Zig Ziglar once made an interesting comment in a talk he invited me to in the late eighties. He said that in America, a person is free to dye his hair pink, wear an earring in his nose, cover his neck with the most outrageous tattoos imaginable, and inject the F word into every sentence. “But,” said Zig, “employers are also free not to hire him.”
And that’s the reason I wrote this article. It’s for those who sometimes second-guess themselves and start wondering if their efforts to be well groomed and conduct themselves in a gracious, civil, professional manner will actually pay off. The answer is a resounding YES! Though a surfer-dude type occasionally finds a way to slink in under the “non-music music” door and make it big, it shouldn’t be your concern.
Why? Because the success or failure of the surfer-dudes of the world has no effect whatsoever on your success. There’s no denying that raunchy clowns like Miley Cyrus, Lady Gaga, and Kanye West enjoy a brain dead audience of millions worldwide, but it doesn’t prevent clean-cut, seriously talented young people like David Garrett, Josh Groban, and Il Volo from making it big.
If you haven’t yet been infected by the sloth culture of surfer-dudeism, don’t be intimidated. Stay your course. There are millions of us out here who still appreciate high quality — and are willing to pay for it.
Stay the course of being decent – absolutely. Take true pride that you are a reasonable, intelligent, willing-to-work person. Your ability to bring a smile to someone's face due to your positive, realistic outlook and actions is much appreciated by the majority. Let those others remind you of what you are glad not to be. Fame does not equate to being a good role model.
Thank you for another great post. The only other name I wish you would add to your list: Cyrus, Gaga is Justin Bieber.
Yes, a very good article.
Comfort yourself in that Bieber isn't an American, John. He's Canada's problem.
unfortunately, also in America we are obligated to fund the surfer-dudes of the world by unemployment payments, food stamps, health care, and whatever else they come up with out there on the left coast
Sean Hannity had Surfer-Dude on his program about a week ago and offered the kid a job in the Dakotas driving a truck, a job that would pay him $80,000 a year. Surfer Dude instantly declined. Surprised?
Must be because of all those millions he's gonna reap (someday…..any day now……) from his band caused him to "remain focused" on the task at hand. After all, he says he practices daily with his band. Can't get more dedicated than that – NOT.
I know nothing about surfer-dude other than what RR wrote, but don't be surprised if S-D's positive attitude of making it big with his band actually happens … remember the Beatles? – you just never know. This article is more a commentary on the abuses of the welfare system – and S-D is becoming the poster child of everything that is wrong with it. What ever became of personal responsibility for one's life – and the values that made America – America?
Not surprised. North Dakota is too far from the surf.
So, you "believe that quality in….people…will rise to the top."
Then how do you explain Obama, Bush, Clinton, Carter, et.al? The presidents we've had haven't been anomalies, they just keep on coming.
You can blame the "quality" of our elected officials on the "quality" of the electorate. In the real world (a.k.a. the private sector), people vote with their wallets – those who do an impeccable job and are willing to ASK for the price they deserve for that work gain fans who, as Rabbi Daniel Lappin says, "shower them with fan mail consisting of paper printed with the faces of past presidents." The Obamaphone woman and those fine denizens of Detroit who stormed Cobo Arena for their "Obama cash" are the faces – and the reasons – for our current situation.
Our country needs reforms in the area of running for public offices, lobbying, political contributions, etc… The way it has been recently requires too much money to be elected.
Indeed. As long as America allows it's elected positions to be bought, it get what it deserves. Limit campaign expenditures to $100K per congressmen and then they will have to run on their own merits.
I agree with Robert that Sufer-Dude's success–or failure–has absolutely nothing to do with other people's outcomes. That said, I see no reason to denigrate Sufer-Dude. In fact, his existence could be taken as evidence that we live in a free society. What would have happened to him in, say, Nazi Germany or the USSR? I like the idea that people can be whatever they want as long as they don't get in my way.
As for the food stamp issue, I don't blame Sufer-Dude but rather the representatives who pass legislation that allows freeloaders to freeload. Of course, food stamps are not our biggest government catastrophe. A friend of mine just spent a day in a state capital where lobbyists were wall-to-wall, creating laws that benefited their clients without regard to the fate of everyone else. A "bought government" is a bad government.
"we live in a free society" – how can we be free when our property can be taken by force and given to the dude? You think you are free just because you can elect your own ruler?
Correctly articulated.
So long as serf(er) dude's wealth can be coerced from him and redistributed to surfer dude there is no freedom.
Voting for the lessor of two excrements is not what constitutes a "free society". Murray is watching too much Fox news when he should be reading Lysander Spooner…..
serfers, technically boluses & chyme, ride the peristaltic wave down the usg ("g" stands for guidoment) intestinal tract. duodenum (bastardized "dude"…) is the first section of the small intestine. next comes the jejunum ("jejune" & "serfer" are synonyms). the end of the small intestine odyssey is the ileum – the serfer is almost home(r). cecum, colon, rectum & anal canal – the large intestine serf breaks – come at the end. after that, all that's left is the flush, coriolis effect to the right, drop straight down into the pipeline, & flow on into the sewage treatment plant – where all are equally excrement, & none the lesser. ☻
Dude!!! You are a Promethean thinker, cloned, I do believe, from Prometheus himself! For not even a son of a God should cognate so well!
"Jejune", indeed! Zombified! Noctambulant! Somnolent! The serfer is that and more…..
The serfer, a nourishing meat, chewed and swallowed up by the collectivist state; a meal on a journey of self discovery. The serfer-turd is schooled to believe that he's going to be "hanging ten" on a glorious "freedom"-wave as he rides all the way to the beach of silver-surfer heaven; but in reality the wave ends at the putrid pile emitting that fetid smell of statism.
cow on a bun (cowabunga), rs dude…meat, indeed.
Reality Seeker: Do you really want to take the position that there is "NO freedom" simply because some of our earnings are redistributed–or spent on projects we don't approve of? Maybe you're just being rhetorical? Or are you saying that you, personally, enjoy "no freedom"? If that's true, wow!
By the way, I never watch Fox news except when Jon Stewart includes clips in his show. I get my news from a wide variety of sources–everything from the New York Times to some right-wing fundamentalist radio shows. I read Truthout and I read Townhall. I also talk about the news with friends nearby (over coffee) and with friends who live around the world.
Why would you think I watch too much–or any–Fox news? I'm curious: Does Fox news promote the idea that we live in a free society?
Maybe freedom for you, then, is being able to watch Fox News without worrying about someone ragging on you for watching Fox News.
Right. Are you free to not pay your taxes that are wasted on the likes of surfer dude? Just try not paying you taxes and sooner or later, someone with a gun shows up. In America, you freer that some other countries, but you not free at all.
I didn't mean we live in a perfectly free or perfect society. But we do have many freedoms, wouldn't you agree? Robert is free to publish his essays and the rest of us are free to comment. I am free to write books on almost any subject I like. I can travel the world–if my bank account permits it, although the government did for a while prohibit me from visiting Cuba (not that I want to go there).
I'm free to practice any religion or no religion. I'm free to marry whomever I like. (Years ago, in certain parts of the country, a person couldn't marry someone of another race–so we're free in that regard). I'm free to start almost any kind of business–and I've started a few. I'm free to dress as I like (I seem to recall prohibitions in this connection in Mao's China; and certain fundamentalist groups even in the U.S. limit what their followers can wear.)
Will you deny all these freedoms–and many others–just because the government has the power to collect some of what I make, and occasionally redistribute it? Actually, redistribution is common. For example, some folks without cars were taxed to pay for the Interstate Highways which I often enjoy.
Perhaps for you there is no "free society" unless it's perfectly free as you define it. But that doesn't seem to be a helpful view. Can't you imagine a society in which–for example–Mr. Ringer would not be allowed to publish? How sweet it must be for him that he has this soapbox.
Mr. Suid,
You are a gentleman. I retract the off-the-cuff remark about you watching too much Fox News, even though I think the other sources are no better.
"Freedom" can be measured in many ways. For example, when a loaf of bread is mostly tax and regulation, like it is today, then it can be rightly said that the loaf's producers and consumers are mostly unfree; thus, how can it be said that "society" is free absent a free market?
Do we truly even live in a "society"? Or is what we live in more like a farm? A milk cow may or may not be freer than a beef cow, depending on the degree of confinement and the date of death, but neither shall ever experience the freedom of a mustang. A man is not free unless taxation is voluntary; he is not free in this America for more reasons than I shall list; but it all comes down to this; he is not free unless the only regulation required of him is the non-aggression principle.
When Benjamin Franklin entered Philadelphia for the first time, it cost him one penny per loaf of bread. How much tax did he pay? Can you guess? Why is bread risen so much in price? Do you know? Comparatively, was Ben a milk cow, beef cow or a mustang? What are you? Can you tell me?
wheat belly*, grain brain*, gmo food, fluoridated water, mercury vaccines (& lightbulbs), fda approval, nsa perusal, fiat currency, false flag fervency, Martha stewed, Wesley sniped, snowed in Sheremetyevo airport…(your turn, everybody can ‘contribute a verse’…)
*book titles
gluten-free music, by bread (1972)
"This Isn't What The Governmeant"
Sure gets funny thinkin' 'bout money
Makin' my daily bread,
The more you make, the more they take
You never seem to get ahead,
You break your backs just to pay your tax
Then you don't like the way that it's spent,
Somewhere back we jumped the track
This isn't what the government…
Bet my now I've made a hundred thou
But I ain't saved a dime,
The IRS came out best
They got my money every time,
It can't be fair when the millionaire
Never has to give them a cent,
Sad to say we've lost the way
This isn't what the government…
Then the war, don't know what for
Somebody said it had to be fought,
I'se 'sposed to go but I said no
'Cause I've afraid I might get shot,
but here I am on my hands and knees
scrubbin' in my dungarees
I got burned but I finally learned
This is what the government
Another healthy loaf of bread (1971)
“Mother Freedom”
Freedom, keep walkin'
Keep on your toes and don't stop talkin' 'bout
Freedom, get goin'
Lots to be learned and lots to be known 'bout
People gotta reach 'em
Sit 'em right down and then you gotta teach 'em 'bout
Freedom, gotta win it
Gotta put yourself smack dab in it
Hey tomorrow
Now don't you go away
'Cause freedom
Just might come your way
Freedom, keep tryin'
People stay alive and people keep dyin' for
Freedom, so don't lose it
Ya gotta understand ya just can't abuse it
Freedom, get movin'
Never gonna stop till everybody's groovin' on
Love for – one another
Callin' some friend and callin' some brother
Hey tomorrow
You're not so far away
Mother freedom
We'll know you well someday
A parasitic surfer dude doesn't concern me nearly as much as bankster dude does. And let's not forget bureaucratic dude, CIA dude, NSA dude, FBI dude, bleeding-heart dude, religious-crusader dude, lawyer dude, TSA dude, law-enforcement-gun-crazy-steroid-headed-power-loving police-dude, coercive-statist-political dude …….and did I leave anybody out? Oh ya, the most troubling dude on earth: War dude— as in nuclear war with Russia or China or any other country who dares to stand up to that democrazy amerikan-dude, Obama, and his Secretary of Excrement, John Kerry, and that warmonger dude, John McCain.
Zig's statement is not so true anymore about not being free to hire somebody – in many instances now, that can be certain business suicide via lawsuit. And the culture is nowhere near as supportive of hard work and associated character traits as it used to be. Oh, these will return. But only after we see what chasing the opposite causes to happen in this country.
The pendulum needs to swing back to the days when men started the early morning with a shower and shave. They walked with good posture and were out to impress and convince an employer to hire them. But again there are also the clean cut cons out there that are wolves in sheeps clothing. They say buyer beware, or should I say decent citizen beware.
Tis true in book publishing as well. I've written a string of solid books, and the best I get is an occasional literary agent comment that my submission was well-written. But no $50,000 advance. "Cesspool Culture". Mr. Ringer put very well. I've referred to my home area, Detroit, the same way. Mr. Ringer suggests perseverance, but it is difficult to keep the faith these days. And at my age, time is runnin' out! But, even if there is no material reward for writing, the creative act is a satisfying end in itself. But it would be gratifying to have some literate readers for my books that as yet are but manuscripts, not books.